- Nate Lemann
ALIEN HORROR SUMMER - NO. 2: THE THING (1982) MOVIE REVIEW
John Carpenter’s remake of the 1950s horror thriller escalates the horror to unthought of levels of grotesque terror…and became the most perfect encapsulation of paranoia.
by Nate Lemann
At this point in the list, it is a true matter of personal preference what your number one will be: not only are our final two films the best horror films of all-time, but they are some of the best films ever made...period.
For this list, we will now look at John Carpenter’s timeless horror masterpiece “The Thing”. While technically a remake of the Howard Hawkes-produced 1951 film (a very of its time horror picture), this movie is it’s own beast altogether, bleeding a dread into the picture that can be suffocating. The film opens with a dog running through the Antarctic wilderness, a Norwegian helicopter in hot pursuit (the bit that Kurt Russell’s character keeps calling them “Swedes” is a great fun piece of characterization). This copter isn’t looking to capture the sweet looking dog: it’s trying to kill it. When the dog and copter stumble onto a separate American base, the Norwegians get quickly dispatched, and the poor dog is saved.
Kurt Russell’s MacReady, the base's pilot, is forced to take the doc (Richard Dysart) and the base commander Garry (Donald Moffat) over to see what was going on at the Norwegian base. What they stumble across is a scene of pure horror. Only one human body remains, a radio man who slit his own throat instead of facing some darker, hinted at fate. They also stumble across a huge piece of ice…that is hallowed out, like something crawled out of an icy prison. The most disturbing thing is a burnt body in the snow…but seemingly made up of two human bodies. Videos at the base end up having them discover a dig site…one that contains a futuristic flying saucer. From the thickness of the surrounding ice, it looks to have been in the frozen cavern for over thousands of years.
As the three return to base, the dog they rescue begins acting odd. The way Carpenter eerily shoots the canine is masterful, hinting at its odd nature…and more nefarious intentions. After a very horrific incident at the kennel, the men realize they are not alone on base. There appears to be some sort of creature that can imitate any form of organic life, as base scientist Blair (an amazing Wilford Brimley performance), begins to posit. Not only that, but it appears that every part of this “thing” is alive…each cell a whole on its own. It is one of the most ingenious and fantastic concepts in all of horror. Not only does paranoia pervade all the base members but the creature itself is a paranoid wreak, constantly lashing out when it is afraid of being discovered. With it also separate and a non-hive mind organism, there is opportunity for there to be multiple imposters at once.
Blair’s breakdown starts off the insanely paranoid period of the film. That paranoia has been argued for decades to be the lasting iconic “character” in the film, with most film’s following the blueprint laid out by this picture to depict cabin fever-induced paranoia . As things devolve on the base, the audience is treated to iconic set piece after iconic set piece: the CPR and blood test scenes are just stunning examples of building tension that gets more than paid off in cathartic carnage. It all builds to one of best endings in film history, so perfect and nihilistic.
Aside from Russell, Brimley, Moffatt, Keith David, and the pervasive paranoia, the other amazing performance is Stan Winston’s just show-stopping practical effects. It is the most amazing and grotesque creature effects ever designed and somehow ages better than the digital VFX of the 2011 prequel film with the same name. It is the definition of nightmare fuel, with non-homogeneous designs, never prepared for what form the creature(s) will take next. It is the type of work that makes you wonder out-loud “Man, we used to make real effects for movies". For a film so gross and horrific, there is an odd macabre beauty to the creature designs.
John Carpenter, the man who already changed the trajectory of horror with “Halloween”, was never better than this masterpiece, at-the-time derided reviews and box office failure aside. All these decades later, the film has risen above cult classic to a transcendent level of perfect films.
FINAL RATING: 5/5 Stars (If you look up “Paranoia” in the dictionary, you will find this masterpiece)
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